"He's...." I sighed. "I don't want him near me anymore, that's all...." I said, a slight weavering tone of sadness was in my voice. I was staring sadly at the flowers to my right, avoiding eye contact with Xensoa.
"All I know, is that I want Nebx to stray away." I said. I kept repeating in my head that I couldn't feel, and that I didn't care for Nebx. Though, I was starting to believe that less...
"It's as bad as bad can be...." I told her. I stared at the flowers to my right with dull eyes. I felt very annoyed with Nebx at this point. I couldn't even sort out what I feel. I felt lost...
I smiled back at her. "Bad." I said. I walked over to the empty side of the bench, and sat down beside Xensoa. I sighed, feeling a bit sad, but not wanting to feel at all. I kept telling myself in my mind, that I couldn't feel...
I walked down the halls, and reached the doors leading into The Garden. 'Maybe I should go to The Garden. It's large and very pretty. I might be able to clear my mind, there...' I thought. I walked up to the door, and opened it slowly. I walked into The Garden, and looked at one of the benches. Xensoa was sitting on it, sketching the flowers. "Hello Xensoa." I said to her, walking over to her.
I threw eight more knives at the wall, then stopped. I let my head drop, and evened my ragged breathing. I took deep breaths, then took one final deep breath, slowly let it out, and rose my head back up. I figured that I would be fine now, that I couldn't feel, and would not allow myself to do so. I slowly stood up, and walked to my door. I unlocked it, then walked outside of it, lightly closing it behind myself. I started walking down the halls, on a walk to clear my mind of what's happened.
...Hamsters FTW? XD But seriously? My big fat black cat LOVES boxes! She's so weird, she'll stuff herself into the smallest boxes, it's surprising that they don't bust! She is addicted to boxes, and if she sees and empty box, she'll be right there. She's so silly. XD ....Okay, I'm done now. >.>
It's alright. I've been bagged a bunch of times by videos like that, myself. I learn to pause the vid, and read the comments, as I keep comming across scary vids...XD;
I clicked the link, paused the video, read the comments, then watched the video without sound. It wasn't scary. :3
I was still sitting in my seat, eyes closed, leaned back. I sighed, unable to relax. I felt empty and restless. I snapped my eyes open, and stood up quickly. "I can't stand this." I said aloud. "What do I do??" I asked myself. I walked over to my bed, and sat down. I let flames flow through my fingers, and the flames formed throwing knives between my fingers. I threw the knives in my left hand at the wall above my art table, stabbing into the wall with keen accuracy. I threw the knives in my right hand at the wall afterwards. I then conjured up eight more knives between my figres, thrown the ones in my left hand at the wall, followed by the ones in my right. I kept this rhythm going, not stopping. I was trying to get rid of the angry confusion built up in me.
I finished my drawing, and looked over the sloppy design. It was of a pack of wolves. The wolves looked angry, they were in attacking positions, and they viciously beared their fangs. There were 7 wolves. I sat back in the chair, and sighed, dropping my pencil on the desk. 'Maybe...if I just keep myself busy, and away from Ne...The Superior, I will not feel anything.' I thought. I closed my eyes softly, and slowly, and I tried to relax myself.
I was still lying on my bed, pouting and angry. I sat up, and sighed. 'I cannot feel.' I said sternly in my mind, one last time. I then got up off of the bed. I grabbed my hoody, and slipped it on, zipping it up. I walked over to the desk, and sat down in the chair. I grabbed my pencil, and a blank sheet of paper, and I started drawing quickly on it...
'...What just happened?' I asked myself in my mind. 'One minute, it's a walk....next minute, I'm being hugged....I'm so confused. I just don't understand....I'm not supposed to feel, right? So why do I think I feel..? Maybe I'm just loosing it. I've been through so much. I have to stop thinking I can feel. I must. For Nebx's sake, and for my own. We CAN'T feel. We can't...' I was lying on my bed, and I turned to face the wall. I glared at the wall. 'I can't feel.' I repeated in my mind, trying to force myself to believe it.
I finished drawing my picture, and looked at it. I had drawn a pack of wolves, the alpha male and alpha female nuzzling faces, and the rest of the pack members either lazing about, playing, or being idol. I dropped my pencil, shut the little light off, and walked over to my bed. I took my hoody off, and hung it on a bedpost. I then laid down, and stared at the ceiling, thinking. OOC: I'm going to bed. Good Night!
I reached my room door after a bit of walking, and opened it. I walked inside, and shut the door, locking it. I then walked over to my little work table, and sat down. I turned on the desk lamp, grabbed a pencil, grabbed a paper, and started drawing.
I looked at Xaeon, and said, "It's alright." I then walked passed her, and continued down the hall.
I walked to the door. I grabbed the handle, then looked at Nebx. "Feel free to come inside. It's a bit cold out here, anyways." I said to him. I then walked inside, and started walked down the halls, headed twords my room.
"...I'd like to go inside the castle, now, please." I said to Nebx.
"Umm..." I said, blushing. I was becoming very shy at this point...
"...What?" I asked Nebx, looking up at him.
