The words hurt, but Tinarah was beyond tears at this point. She was done being upset and crying to herself as she stared Fost down. "I nearly got Stamatis killed? And where were you? I called and you ignored the plea for help, and yet you have the gall to blame me, when I was the one to get Master Gero out of that place. I was starved and dying and I still did more than you did. I am still not healthy but I was out there fighting for these worlds, fighting the darkness. You are fine sending children to battle for you while all the masters hide from what they view as their failures. I know why you are doing this. I know why you are like this and I know it hurts. By gods I know it hurts. Being betrayed by someone, or how about trying everything you know! When a whole world around you was a lie and controlled by someone else as a means to an end, and it leaves you so broken you don't know how to live, how do you carry on? You do what you have to and fight, not hide like a coward. So you are right, you are not the Fost I know. You are not the one I admired and was proud to call my uncle when I had no other family. No that one was so much stronger than you are, you are just an angry coward, nothing like the Fost I knew. So go ahead and hide behind children and let them go to war for you, but if you dare blame anyone else for anything that happens, I suggest watching your back." Her eyes burned with tears that didn't quite come out, but she stared down Fost. She hadn't been angry with him for not coming to help until now, until he blamed her for it. This wouldn't help her case, she knew. He would never see her, love her the way the other Fost did, but she would be damned if she let him walk around and blame her, or any of her friends for these problems when he wouldn't even stop to help himself. "The Fost I knew died in the war against darkness, along with everyone else. The only difference is everyone else is back now and still fighting."
It was about half way through their walk when Auburn had to get off of Lazuli's hand knowing that soon her strength would return to her, and at that point she would be too big to be riding around like she was. Not a word came out of Auburn's mouth during their travel, she was still getting over the feeling of embarrassment from the whole ordeal, something that she would have to get used to. At this point there was no hiding the fact that this was going to happen every time she used her semblance, a draw back tat could be harmful in battle if they weren't careful. At least her father had taught her already how to keep it from being too much of an issue. If she remembered her training, then there was no reason that she shouldn't be fine in any upcoming battles. As they reached the temple, Auburn found herself staring at the water, admiring it's beauty. She hadn't noticed what Blaine was doing until after the path opened for them. Looking to her team, she waited a moment for someone else to go first, before crossing over to the temple, her weapons in hand just in case something were to jump out at them here. She knew that things would not be a walk in the park, but she didn't quite know what to expect as they continued into the beautiful temple grounds. By no means was Arian pleased with where they ended up, but once there, there was no turning back. He would just have to leave Lloyd and hope that their former team leader could fend for himself for a while. Arian didn't know what pissed him off more, the fact that Lloyd was taken, or the fact that it was the White Fang's fault. Either way there were at this temple now so they had a job to do there. "After you, oh fearless leader." His sarcasm wasn't just because he wasn't happy, Arian also specialized in range fighting, taking the lead would not be helpful if they ran into trouble. They could still be snuck up on from behind, but that seemed less likely and he would still be watching the back if need be.
The look that Fost gave her was enough to make Tinarah freeze. Of course she couldn't just walk right back up and hope that things would be even close to what they were before. Stamatis might have accepted the reality that she laid out before him, but Fost was different. It had taken her years to really see him warming to her, how could she think that it would just happen so easily. Fost had turned back to Qamar after Boreas and Illiana had left, rather annoyed. Anxiety started to rise, she could feel her heart pounding as she tried to think of the right words to say to him, nothing seemed appropriate though. "I'm sorry. I just thought. I wanted to see you, hope that a part of you would remember me just a little. I am sorry if I was wrong I don't mean to be intrusive." She stammered taking a couple steps back, but not running away just yet. There was still a chance that she misread the expression or that he would be willing to talk about it, but she didn't want to force him. No he already had a relationship like this once and it ended badly for him. She wouldn't put him through such things again. The papers tucked in her pocket started to burn and she started to wish she never collected them in the first place, but there was no erasing the knowledge now, only living with it.
After the battle Rae will put 5 points into stamina 3 into attack, and 1 into accuracy I will also buy and equip Water Slide
Okay this was just annoying. She was gritting her teeth against his attacks, not only did they hurt but she couldn't stop herself from flinching, and it was that one moment that was needed for the world to move on around her without her realizing it. She was done with all this magic bullshit, it was time to just deal with this guy, personally. No more hiding in the back, not like she had done that anyways. Raelyn rushed forward and punched the guy in the face, as she did that she released a blast of water at him. "Just die already for fucks sake. I don't want to deal with this any more!" She yelled at him, not backing off to safety after that attack, instead staring Hector straight down to see what he would do when they didn't cower before him, despite them clearly losing. Realyn used Strike and Water Stream
When Nini finished her breakfast, Tinarah went back to the sink and made quick work of cleaning up. When she was done she found herself lacking direction in what to do next, but knew that she had to do something, keep her mind calm. Thinking back to some of the routines that she had with Stamatis in the other realm, they usually started the day with meditation, but since she had not done that yet, or in quite some time really, Tinarah figured it would be a good time to get some fresh air and meditate. Perhaps then she would be more suited to deal with people and they might actually want to talk to her for more than just a moment. Tinarah picked Nini up in her arms carrying the cat with her. She figured Nini would appreciate wondering outside too, and Tinarah didn't think she wanted to be completely alone, the quiet company of the cat sounded pleasant. As she exited the castle into the courtyard, Tinarah noticed a few things. First there was more people outside than she hoped for. Second was that one of the girls who was standing there wasn't one of them, instead one of the Light Chasers students, but the only one who had been nice to her in the fight where- She cut off her thoughts there, forcing them to still into something more peaceful. Tinarah wondered what brought her here, but knew that if it was anything harmful the council wouldn't let her near. She was being escorted by a member of council though... No not a member of council. Tinarah walked closer. "U-Uncle Fost!" She took a few running steps almost like she was going to hug him, but as she got near enough to see his face she stopped and stepped back, the light in her eyes quickly fading. It was instinct to run to him and give him a big hug. She was usually very glad to see him, but this Fost didn't know her and he hadn't even tried to contact her like he had promised. "I-I mean... Mast.. master Fost." It was hard she realized, forcing herself to call him Master. It felt so distant and not like the man she had known. There was so much she wanted to say, but not a word came out of her mouth as she stared at him, waiting to see how he reacted first.
Somehow Karina found herself leading the party without intending to. As she swam off, first she heard something with Luna and Aux going on, but she was far enough ahead at that point that she didn't catch much of her. Karina glanced to her side, expecting at least Beuce to be there with her, but he and Steel fell back to talk to Aux after Luna's little explosion. It all felt so backwards to her. Usually she was the one hanging in the back and going off at people. Whatever had happened to her after Lea made her a leader, she didn't like it, it felt weird. Either way, someone had to pay attention to something outside group conflict, and it looked like this time it would be her. As they got closer there was a flash of light and they were too late. "Damn it!" Karina cursed as they got closer. There was no sign of Ursula but Ariel was there gasping for breath under water. "For Zues sake! Of course this would happen. Lets get her to the surface." They needed to protect the princess but of course no one would listen to her, and now things were going south and quickly. She helped Ariel to the surface where a man greeted her. Karina watched rather skeptical, even after Sebastian said they would stay and keep an eye out. "We will try and be quick. I don't trust him, or this situation. When we are done, I don't care if he smites me, I am going to have a word with that damned king of yours." Karina grumbled before diving back down to find Ursula, looking at the rest of the group. "We better hurry, I know she was obsessed with the people on land, but I don't think it will be safe for her, not with all the crap that has been going on lately. Lets make this quick."
After taking the candy and handing over the jewels Everette gave a quick look to Maira almost like to tell her to hurry up a bit before turning back towards where Lakoda waited for them. He tossed her the bag of salt water taffy, taking a bon bon for himself as he looked up the road, getting a general feel for where they had to go. "So the gentleman over there said we should be able to find our man in the in up the way there. Apparently there was an attack just last night and a family lost a kid. It doesn't sound good the way things have been going here so we better get this figured out quick." After just coming back from a mission where he watched a little girl almost die, he had enough with things hurting children It was unfair and they needed to stop it however they could. He had seen enough children hurt he didn't want to see more if he could help it, but he knew that it was unavoidable. "When Conrad and Maira finish, we should head up to the inn, I am sure that they will be glad to see us." The docks were busy and most of the ships were nothing like the yacht that she had remembered her father owning. Thea had no clue what the man giving out the quest was supposed to look like, but not with the patience to walk around asking everyone nicely, she just started walking down the dock calling out, "Paul Taters? Hello? We are here from Divine Rose! Where are you?" It might not have been the most polite way to get peoples attention, but Thea was certain it would be effective. Someone would at least hear here and point her in the right direction.
With Torrin leaving before he could even bother listening to her reply, Tinarah was left in a nagging silence. She generally didn't mind the silence when it was her choice, but with it coming from people walking away from her, after seeming to only hint at conversation, then not care, it made it worse. She kept her head down as she did the dishes, knowing that at first, that hurt shined in her eyes. She didn't want the masters to see as some brought in their dishes when they finished eating. After a while Tinarah had finished the dishes, just in time to hear a small meow at her feet. After Nini disappearing for most of the morning, it seemed the cat had found her way back. "You didn't get a proper meal did you? Here let me see If I can find you something." Tinarah spoke softly almost trying to bribe the cat to not leave her again as she went to the fridge, looking for milk and food that would be good for a cat. As she did she saw a plate in there with her name on it... or sort of her name. It was spelled with too many r's and it made Tinarah wonder who misspelled her name like that. It made her smile a little bit however as she shook her head and found what seemed to be left over chicken from another night. Putting the milk in a bowl and the chicken on a plate, Tinarah put them down for Nini and sat back and waited for the cat to eat. "Do you think I am unreasonably over emotional?" She asked the cat, knowing she wouldn't get a response. She couldn't stop thinking about how it felt like she got upset too easily and it drove people away, wonder if it wasn't normal to react in such ways after what she had been through.
Tinarah found herself slightly startled by the tap on her shoulder, she was even more surprised when it was Torrin standing there with two scraps of paper in his hand. "Oh... Thank you." Torrin seemed almost as awkward as she was. He placed the scraos of paper away from the water, but Tinarah found herself following, drying her hands as she walked over to look at them. "I will have to put them with the rest later. I... Just thought it would be good for us to get into the mind of our enemy is all." A poor lie to cover up her obsessing. She hadn't even known they were about the Light Chaser until last night. She couldn't even explain her obsessing anymore, not as each one she read made her circumstance hurt more. "Don't worry about the dishes, chores... The structure, it helps." Or at least it was better than just sitting still and letting her mind wonder where she didn't want it to go. Kept her from locking herself in her room like she was prone to doing.
She wasn't entirely sure what her standings with Stamatis was, but she had a good idea. "Well he let me sleep on his couch last night, and agreed to train me, so I think I have a decent standing." Tinarah admitted before pushing herself away from the wall looking around. "You know, I should probably go back and clean up from breakfast, it wasn't good of me to run out and not clean the mess I left." More than anything this was an attempt at giving herself chores and structure, things to do until Stamatis and Choma had some proper work for her to do. It was true that she hadn't cleaned up, but in a way there was a part of her that thought others should pitch in and help too. Either way she wiped the last of the tears from before from her face and turned to head back down the hall towards the kitchen, her heart feeling slightly lighter after just venting some of that to Chrono. Entering she could only sigh at the stack of cooking dishes that had been left, and had a feeling that more dishes would be coming in as the Masters finished their meals. Rolling up her sleeves, she started filling a sink with water, making a mental note to ask Stamatis about more clothes. Even when Choma had rescued her she had not had much for clothing, and that had been six years before. Whatever had remained she had grown out of, escaping jail left her with nothing, and the one outfit from Selene had seen plenty as it was. It was time for her to get some clothing of her own that she wouldn't feel as guilty ruining in combat. That was something that could come after she was done with the dishes however.
Dawn found herself sitting back and listening to the conversations back and forth and the awkward arguing of the group. She kept her mouth shut and just listened before following them through the portal, into the manor that they were apparently heading to. "If we just need to find this portal, should we split up into smaller groups, survey and meet back. If we come across someone we don't engage as to not pick a fight we can't win? I get the sense that some of you might be confident in your skills, but I don't think it is wise to test them here, this isn't our territory it is someone else's." Dawn pointed out as she looked back to the others, her mind working, thinking about how they were to go about this. "Well shall we?"
This was going too far, this guy, he wasn't ever going to be a welcome part of the team if Arian had anything to say about it. However apparently he didn't as Dubhan spoke out against them, at least he had some sense to him even if it didn't go in Arian's favour. Maybe they could have talked it out but before that was even an option something strange happened. Noire started singing, and while that was strange in and of itself, it wasn't the strangest thing that happened. Shadows rose up and dragged them trying to drag them. While Arian tried to fight it, it wasn't any good. Gritting his teeth he crossed his arms. "You are an asshole, I hope you know that." He cursed at Noire.
"Even with the sacrifice that I was about to make, we still nearly lost Take. I don't know what sort of other option there was, what we had was almost not good enough." Tinarah sighed closing her eyes for a moment and repeatedly running her hands through her hair over and over again. Just thinking, trying to relax in some way. "Either way, I am not going out there looking for death Chrono, if that is what you are worried about. For now I just want to relax and learn more. I want to learn how to be okay. Get some normality back into my life. With Stamatis I started to heal when he gave me structure and normality. I could figure out my life a bit better. I want to see if this whole keyblade thing could work for me. Sure there is nothing special about me, I probably can't keep up with everyone, but if it doesn't work, I don't know what I would do. I mean, I can't go home, and if I can't stay here or fine my way back Stamatis... the other one I mean... then what am I to do? I can't just rely on you forever after all." She knew that he brother would offer to help but they were both almost adults, she wasn't going to lean on him forever, even if she healed enough to be able to face people better. She knew that it would be a part of healing, learning to talk with others, laugh without something pushing her back to this state. She was trying, she was sick of running off and crying, or having to try and convince people to let her think about herself however she wanted to. She knew that they were trying to help, but Tinarah didn't see herself as depressed as others seemed to think she was. To her it was all fact and she was learning to live with that, being told not to was almost more challenging than just accepting it and moving on with her life. Perhaps that is why she went to Stamatis upon returning, he never argued with her, instead listening to her and teaching her ways to work through it herself instead of telling her how she should change. He seemed to have a silent kind of support that she seemed to work best with.
"It's not... it's not like I want to die or anything. I don't want to carry the burden by myself. I am not that suicidal. It is just. I spent five years training to be stronger, with a good teacher who taught me a lot. I spent another few months under strict training with Torrin so I might be ready for a war. All that time and I come back and within a few days you guys are as strong, if not stronger than I am all in your own way. If it took me five years to do what you guys did in a few days, then I won't be of that much use for that much longer. When the Light Chaser showed up, I knew what he was capable of. I knew what he could do, have seen it first hand. At that moment I had two choices, let Torrin deal with it and likely die, or possibly give you all a chance to get away. The life of a master, someone who can actually grow with you guys and keep you safe, or the life of a girl that is bound to fall behind soon enough and won't be of much help much longer, objectively, which would you choose?" A challenge for her brother, to see what she was doing not as trying to die, not as some suicidal girl who shouldn't be allowed out, but as someone making the hard decisions so others wouldn't have to. Willing to die so that everyone else wouldn't have to. "I might be broken and struggling to find the light again, but I am not that far gone, not yet. I still want to see a better world one day, if that is ever possible. And I still have promises that I intend to keep." In another realm entirely where they would need to at least be warned of the danger if she could ever get back.
Tinarah heard Take call after her, but she didn't want to stop, not until she was outside of so many peoples prying eyes. By the time she stopped however it was not Take that had gone after her, but her brother that met her in the halls. She still didn't know where to go, but at least there was less people to witness her tears. She had thought she had grown stronger than this, she had grown stronger than it. Now at least she fought for what she believed instead of hiding, but she couldn't stop thinking of herself as the least worthy of anyone. Of course she wanted to live, but she would do whatever it took to make sure that others were able to live first. IT was her first priority and she couldn't stop that, didn't know how. Leaning against the wall, looking at her brother Tinarah stayed silent for a long moment. "I don't think there is any healing, going back." She finally told him. No going back to the shy girl when she had left, no going back to the happy child before their mother died. What she was now she didn't know, she didn't know if she would ever figure it out.
It is still the plan. Sign up will be around beginning of December or end of November
It took her off guard. Tinarah didn't know when the conversation became about her, when Take started worrying about the way that she spoke of herself. In all honesty, Tinarah had thought that she was being rather kind to herself, at least compared to many of her thoughts, and she hadn't been thinking much about herself, but here Take was trying to give her a pep talk. It was enough to make her forget about the food she had been forcing herself to eat. "Thanks but... I just do what I have to, nothing more. I don't want to be anything more." It was a comfort not having too many people look her way, being able to quietly just keep to herself and do what she had to without anyone judging her for it. That was one of her fears, the moment she started to acknowledge herself, the moment others did, she would be put on a scale and never meet expectations. Chrono then spoke up asking them to dial down what they had been doing, but Tinarah only looked away. "Says the guy who has done nothing but protect me all my life no matter what the cost to him. I can't loose you again." She looked to Take. "I can't lose you either. I have been there, that world with out any of you, and I don't want to live in it." Tears started to run down her face without her realizing. "I had to watch Mika die for me to try and get me out of that world and I came back to find her gone here too. One of few friends I have ever really had. I can't live in that world Chrono. So I can't promise that, because I am scared.... I don't know if I can rebuild myself again if anyone else dies. It is so damn hard as is, I am breaking apart everyday more than I am healing. So no. If putting myself last means you all can live then that is what is going to happen." Tinarah admitted before realizing all who shared a table with her. Embarrassed by her tears she got up, excusing herself, trying to hold back tears long enough to leave the room where there weren't so many eyes on her before the tears started anew and Tinarah was left searching for some sanctuary to go and hide in, not knowing if Take or Chrono would follow.
"They let Aria go last time." Tinarah pointed out. "But I don't think any of us should leave regardless, not yet. I don't know what the council is doing but I don't think I will be able to do another excursion like that again any time soon." Tinarah glanced down to the table, the food that she was still, slowly picking at. "I myself am nothing special, no reason they should care about me, but I am not all that healthy right now. I don't want to have to go out again, I told Master Stamatis as much yesterday." Tinarah continued to point out. "And I don't think they will leave us without Torrin or Master Thallasa with us, they didn't last time, I don't know why they would now." She didn't know if it would actually help ease the mind of her friend but Tinarah didn't know what else to tell him. She knew that things weren't good and it was enough that Fost was actually coming, when he didn't even dare come to save Stamatis when the Light Chaser came to attack them. She wasn't going to tell anyone about that part though, her fears. It would only make the situation worse. "I don't think learning more magic would hurt in any way. After all depending on the magic it could be used in all sorts of ways, but ones like it seemed you were looking at, that are more supportive based would be helpful if I.... mess up... again." Like when she nearly died. If she did or disappeared again for some reason. If they were split between worlds, someone else needed to know how to do what she did.
Tinarah noticed her brothers gaze, but didn't make a move to move down quite yet. She still wasn't sure if the conversation was anything that she should be listening in to. It wasn't until Take seemed to acknowledge her that Tinarah finally moved down a seat to properly join the conversation, nibbling slowly on her food at the same time. Take was trying to explain his troubles reading and his desire to learn magic, while Tinarah would not think herself a good teacher, she was decent with magic. Tinarah took the book that was on the table and gave it a look over. "Esuna. you pronounce it Esuna. But I suppose the spelling is a little weird." Tinarah tried to make Take feel better about not figuring it out himself. "If it makes you feel better Take, I didn't finish school myself, and not because I left home. I dropped out after an injury left me in the hospital for a while and too scared to leave home. I learned a little more of the basics, but really Stamatis taught me everything else I needed to know. I am still not one to read for pleasure though." While she could read fine, she herself was slow at it and took her time to get through books. "If you want help with magic, I can certainly try. I am no master, but I would like to say that I do a decent job of it. If you want help reading though... I think Chrono might be a better teacher than I am." Tinarah admitted, the idea of having to read out loud to him to help didn't sit well. Tinarah just figured she would mess up numerous times and confuse Take more. Reading in her head was one thing, but perhaps it was her confidence, but when it came to reading out loud, she constantly stumbled over the words she was trying to say.
