Well, I have a ****ing problem: I still love my ex. I try not to show it, but most of the time I do. I cry at night because I know he hates me and probably wants me to go kill myself or something. I've tried talking to him as a friend, but he's always being an *******. Once I tried talking to him in the lunch line, but all he did was quickly get his food and complain about how the line was too slow (he said that because I was right behind him in line). And he won't even look at me. When he does, he just glares. I keep making little notes in homeroom and paintings in art, and my friends IRL have given them to him during lunch and break. They said he actually looks at them, then he lets his friends look at them. I told them I was sure he was thinking, "My God, why won't she ****ing leaving me alone? I guess I'll show my friends how stupid she is" or something like that when he passes it to his friends. Speaking of which, whenever I make a painting for him in art, the girls at my table call me stupid and crazy. They also try to ruin my paintings by pouring a bunch of paint on them. I don't know what to do. Pretty much everyone has told me to move on and quit being a ****ing crybaby. I told them that's so easy for them to say, they don't know how much I loved him (and still love him).
So, um...yeah. It's pretty much the back row and all our wackiness. We actually had a sub that day, so we pretty much wouldn't be doing that when the teacher's there.
So, this will pretty much be my poetry thread. This is a poem for my crush. He knows I like him, but he only sees me as a really close friend. I know you'll never feel the same nor will you notice me But I really beg to differ when you say we're not meant to be You may be three years older, but age really means nothing When you're so in love like I am with you, I know there could be something Age is only a number, such as three, six, or nine I'm sorry I love you as more than a friend, I just wanted you to be mine And looks don't show the truth, that's all personality On the outside, someone's overweight; on the inside, sugar sweet I'm sorry I'm not perfect, I'm sorry I need you so I'm sorry that I'll miss you when it's time for you to go I'm sorry that my crush on you is filling you with hate I'm sorry that while you leave for college, I simply sit here and wait Wait for you to someday see that you are my life The one to hold and cherish until the day I die (his full name here), although you'll never feel the same, I still dream about you being my love someday...
This is a song I wrote for my friend, Kyi. So I like him as more than a friend, but he doesn't have the same feelings for me... Verse 1: Hey stranger, don't you look happy I haven't seen you in forever Nothing's new in my life, I've just been In love with you for 3 days, but who's counting? Each day pretty much sucks without you But all you can think about is college So what if you're about to graduate? I've been In love with you for 1 week, but who's counting? Chorus: How do you know it's not meant to be if you won't give it a try? I know it, you know it, too If you don't feel the same, baby, I'll be alright It's okay, I'll still be in love with you Like I have been for forever and a day, but who's counting? Verse 2: Time passes, days turn into weeks I've still got the butterflies in my stomach And you'll never care, but I've been In love with you for 12 days, but who's counting? You say I'm too young for you But age should never matter, don't you know better? You're so cute when you make a fool of yourself That's why I've loved you for 3 weeks and counting Chorus: How do you know it's not meant to be if you won't give it a try? I know it, you know it, too If you don't feel the same, baby, I'll be alright It's okay, I'll still be in love with you Like I have been for forever and a day, but who's counting? Bridge: You really have no clue (I can't help it, I can't help it) How much I've dreamt about you (I can't help it, I can't help it) As the months pass, I still hope and pray (I can't help it, I can't help it) I'll forever pour my heart out 'til the day you notice me Chorus: How do you know it's not meant to be if you won't give it a try? I know it, you know it, too If you don't feel the same, baby, I'll be alright It's okay, I'll still be your best friend How do you know it's not meant to be if you won't give it a try? I know it, you know it, too If you don't feel the same, baby, I'll be alright It's okay, I'll still be in love with you Like I have been for forever and a day, but who's counting? Outro: Hey stranger, I hope you're happy Just told you what I've been hiding forever I won't get my hopes up, I just wish you'd Love me for as long as I've loved you, but who's counting? Yeah, he's graduating this year, and I'm just a freshman.
I'm talking about my love life. Well, there's these 2 guys I like. They're both sweet, funny, and really good friends. BUT...they're both seniors, and I'm a freshman. Also, I don't even know if they'd even like someone like me. Not because I'm a freshman, but because I'm kinda fat and not the prettiest girl in the world. Still, just because I'm not the hottest girl in the world, it doesn't mean I don't have feelings and a heart. I really care about the people I love, and I'd do anything for them. But if they like me back, here's the big question: who should I choose? One's into sports, the other one's into music. And I'm into both.
So...yeah, we're not writing poetry in my English 1 Honors class until some time next week, but I decided to try and write something about what I chose as my subject. Sucks that I can't change the subject... He and I We were in love, crazy in fact Crazy for each other Inseparable, unforgettable, caring I missed him every minute of the day And he loved me for who I was Or so I thought... He used me to his heart's content And no longer enjoyed talking to me His behavior changed oh so much I walked to my classes in the morning And to the buses in the evening All alone... Why did he hate me? I told him how I felt He told me that he would try, Try so hard to change back To the boy I knew and loved But what happened the next day? Like an ant on the sidewalk, He crushed me and left me to die I knew it would happen The pain and loneliness of heartbreak can kill anyone I convince myself to find someone better, But I'm still a little crazy Crazy for him, the boy that used me The boy that nearly killed me And he doesn't even care. Yeah, it sucks. And there's no certain rhythm with it and such, so yeah.
I've been feeling very bad lately because my boyfriend dumped me. What makes it worse is that he did it over MySpace instead of in person or over the phone. I told some of my friends that I was over him, but I know I'm not. I cry everytime I hear a love or break-up song, and I just feel so bad because I wrote this song for him, and... I'm sorry. I feel stupid and everything, and he said the reason he broke up with me was because we didn't get to see each other a lot and that it just wasn't working out. I've already cried to my mom about a gazillion times, and I've kind of...cut myself and tried to make myself throw up.
So, here's the thing. I'm writing this for my boyfriend Wes, but I won't give it to him until his graduation day. Which is like next year. Once you read it, you'll probably know why. And yes, it sounds weird for a girl to ask a guy that, but oh well...by the way, this is all I've got so far. I have to make it perfect. Verse 1: I'm so glad that you're here right now Boyfriend, girlfriend, nothing can tear us down But something's bothering me, and I'm worried to death Please stay for a little while, don't go just yet Nothing's wrong, I've just been thinking Of everything we've been through, and everything we could be Will you... Chorus 1: Marry me, marry me? Baby please, baby please I don't, I don't Want you to leave I love you, I love you There's nothing else I can do I'm so afraid of losing you Verse 2: I know we're young, but I'm certain we'll make it I just wanna be with you, fall asleep and wake up in your arms Through every kiss and every hug that made up for every fight Trust me, if we stick together, our future will turn out just fine Yes, it sounds so scary (Yet I keep wishing for it to come true) But please don't reconsider, it's the best thing for me and you Will you... Chorus 2: Marry me, marry me? It's killing me, killing me I can't watch, I can't watch You walk away It feels like, feels like Eternity, eternity Until I get to see your face again
Something random from last semester. Don't ask.
Some song I wrote today after my exam in 7th period. Here's all I have so far: Verse 1: I usually know a liar when I see one But you were the first to catch me off guard I believed every single word you spoke And I didn't know you would tear me apart Baby, how could I be so naive? I didn't notice what you did to me And now it's my turn to suffer But I'll be back to bring you down with me Chorus: I'm finding it hard to believe in anybody Ever since you came and crashed the party That I call my life So long, farewell, just forget about it You stupid loser, did you really doubt that I would be all right? Did I say I'd be crying for you? Well, I guess I wasn't telling the truth It seems we have something in common: We're both liars
This isn't for school or anything. I wrote this out of complete boredom. It's still untitled, and I'm almost finished with Chapter 2. Chapter 1 letters Dear Mom, Where are you? My life has been nothing but complete and total bullshit without you. I'm guessing my letters are beginning to sound like a broken record, huh? I can't help it that Harriet does everything she can to ruin my life. I'm 17, and she won't even let me go on any dates with my boyfriend or let me spend the night at my friend's house. She always has to give me a hard time. I'm a senior in high school, and I'm going to be attending college in August. So she better give me freedom...fast! Of all the parents in the world that needed a daughter, why did you give me to... HER? Well, I better go before she gets home. Bye Mom. I love you, Shana Juliet Carson Another letter to Mom. My real mom. Yes, it sounds stupid, but it's true. Although she claims to be, I know Harriet isn't my real mom. She hates me. Not "despises" or "dislikes". HATES. Harsh, isn't it? Well, that's Harriet for you. Sure, go ahead and say there's a whole bunch of people in the world whose lives are way worse than mine. I highly doubt that. So I have a house, and a lot of food and water. Still, that doesn't feel like home to me. I have two step-brothers and one step-sister (we are all seniors at Willow Acres High), a pretty cool dad (he's a composer), and some friendly neighbors. Yet, it's still not home. My life would be perfect if it weren't for one thing: my wicked step-mother, Harriet. I look over my letter again, checking for any spelling or grammar mistakes. All of my letters have to be perfect for some reason. "No mistakes this time," I tell myself as I slide the letter down into an envelope. After writing the sending and receiving addresses on the front of the envelope, I hide it in a very special place: between my first and second of many notebooks containing drawings of and poems about my real mother. "I'll be sure to stop by the post office after school," I say before turning off my lamp and heading to bed. I decide to check the time just for the hell of it. 11:11 P.M. I lie down, close my eyes, and make a wish. "I wish my mom would write back. Or call. Just something to let me know she cares."
I was very bored today because my mom took my cell phone, cordless phone, and iPod away, so I decided to write some sort of song. A few minutes later, I came up with a good intro to it on my piano, and now my older brother and cousin are wanting to record it. Anyways, here it is. And yes, I know the title sucks. Verse 1: Free flowing like poetry, like a river Forgiven, letting go of me, myself, and I A melody and a harmony blending together Forever into another song, another rhyme Chorus 1: But I hope you're happy, so you can just go on without me I'll sit here for eternity Write some song you'll never see And make my broken fingers bleed Smashing these piano keys Verse 2: Alone in darkness I'm of no importance, just someone who Used to love you, but you're gone and so is everything we shared Once again a heart is broken, and it's so hard to open up to anyone Yeah, no one will listen because then don't even care Chorus 2: But I hope you're happy, so you can just go on without me I'll sit here for eternity Write some song you'll never see Cut my fingers, make them bleed Strumming these guitar strings (Guitar solo) Bridge: Oh, the music has betrayed me Like you did long ago If anybody's out there, please save me And I don't even know what to do My musical pain was wasted on you (Drum solo) Chorus 3: But at least I know you're happy (that's all that matters to me) And you're doing fine without me (But before you leave) Here's my last song, I wrote it for you But you won't hear it, you never do Although my broken heart will never mend For you I'll never sing again So I hope you're happy to finally live your life without me I'll sit for always and eternity And all my songs you'll get to see No longer do my fingers bleed Smashing these piano keys (Strumming these guitar strings) 'Cause no one will remember me I know, I know. It a whole bunch of jibberish, but I was bored. Also, my brother and cousin told me to put in some guitar and drum solos. EDIT: I know, it sucks. BAD.
Yet another song, and like the other songs, it sucks. It's also not finished yet. (Kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me now) (Kill me, kill me, kill me, just kill me) Verse 1: Dying inside again (I feel so out of place) I'm trying to show you who I am (So much more behind these eyes) I could be someone if you would let me But you won't accept me, accept me will you? Chorus: Someone please hear my prayer (Because nobody else will) Don't act like I'm not here (Why don't you see me?) I know you'll ignore me, and I know I'm not worthy enough But God, please kill me now Kill me now Horrible, isn't it?
Well, we have to write short stories in my English 1 Honors class, and this was the only thing I could think of. Anyways, this is all I have written so far. The only title I can think of for it is "Nevaeh". Nevaeh Happily ever after. Good triumphs over evil. Light over dark. None of that applies to me. Though my parents were both pure angels, they gave birth to me. The outcast. The mistake. The dark angel. Every angel lives in Heaven. Every angel except "poor little Nevaeh". No one talked to me or even acknowledged my presence in Heaven. You're not supposed to be around a dark angel. Apparently, we possess a power so evil and so great it could destroy Earth, Heaven, the entire universe. So, to make sure I didn't try to use this power like all the others and to stop the humiliation and embarrassment of having a dark angel, Serafine and Leo (I refuse to call them Mom and Dad) sent me to live on Earth... Forever. So yeah, it pretty much sucks.
This song is untitled for now, and I'm still working on it. Verse 1: I feel so safe in your arms right now, And I wish there was a way we could stay like this somehow I'm so lucky to have you here, And I know that it's crystal clear That you're here to stay Please don't go away Because Chorus 1: I need someone to hold me, I need someone to love me for who I am Don't put me down like your friends do Can't they see our love for each other? Verse 2: I can't wait to see you tonight If loving you is wrong, then I don't wanna be right You're my knight in shining armor, my hero I die inside when it's time for you to go I really want us to stay together Forever and ever because Chorus 1: I need someone to hold me, I need someone to love me for who I am Don't put me down like your friends do Can't they see our love for each other?
No, this time, it isn't a break-up song. It's actually a song I'm writing about this guy I like, Wes. Here it is: Verse 1: Hello, why hello, why hello there My name is Summer, what's your name and number? Was that a bit too much? I'm sorry for that, I'm just nervous I really like you, but there's one major question: Do you like me back? So many questions, and you're the answer to all of them Chorus 1: Who's the smartest, the strongest, the coolest, the funniest Guy I know? Is he loving, determined, so caring, you know that He's the one to go to when you need him I think he's so cute All the stuff that I'm saying is true, 'Cause it's all about you Verse 2: I blush whenever I see you I'm so glad that I got to meet you, now I hope We can be more than friends I totally think it could work out Though you're a junior, I'm a freshman, there is no doubt We can prove them all wrong (Yes we can, yes we can) I've been crushing on you Since the first day of school Chorus 2: You're so sweet and athletic, very energetic Always on my mind (on my mind) I wish you could notice all I write on my notebook is "You and I", my first name, your last I really love you All the stuff I'm saying is true, 'Cause it's all about you Bridge: You and I together forever From the first word to the first date, To the wedding day Okay, so it's too early to say that But it can all start with "Hey" And... Chorus 3: I just can't ignore you, of course, I adore you So very much I wish I could kiss you, oh, how I miss you When you're gone, don't know how I'll survive When I'm not with you All the stuff I'm saying is true, If you asked me if I love you, I'd say, "I do" L.O.V.E. I love you My life is all about you.
I was pretty pissed that my ex kept flirting with me and he decides to say that he doesn't like me anymore. So, I wrote this song: Chorus 1: Hate is too weak of a word To describe my feelings for you, It's not like I haven't heard Everything you said Verse 1: I break your heart one time And all of a sudden, you want me out of your life We can't even be friends I heard you're going out with someone else The rumors and lies, they never end Why don't you (Why don't you want me back now?) Chorus 2: Hate is too weak of a word To describe my feelings for you, It's not like I haven't heard Everything you said You flirt with me everyday, Try to get my attention But all this time, I was a fool To fall for you Verse 2: You used to catch me when I'd fall, and now you do Nothing at all (Go ahead, laugh with all the others) I think I get it now, why don't you just go along and Hate me for what I've done wrong (My God, what is your problem?) I'll just ignore it this time (But I hope you know) Chorus 2: Hate is too weak of a word To describe my feelings for you, It's not like I haven't heard Everything you said You flirt with me everyday, Try to get my attention But all this time, I was a fool To fall for you Bridge: I'm so sorry that I broke your heart, But just go with it (Just go with it, just go with it) And it's not my fault that I pissed you off, So get over it, just get over it (I hate you) But wait... Chorus 2: Hate is too weak of a word To describe my feelings for you, It's not like I haven't heard Everything you said You flirt with me everyday, Try to get my attention But all this time, I was a fool To fall for you Hate is too weak of a word To describe my feelings for you, It's not like I haven't heard Everything you said You flirt with me everyday, Try to get my attention But all this time, I was a fool To fall for you...
Some song I'm working on right now. I think it kinda sucks. Verse 1: Look around, is it too much to handle When everybody puts you down, you go out like a candle All your friends have turned into your foes They don't wanna talk to you ever again, they just want you to go away Chorus: Everyone loves you or hates you or wants you to die There's so much pain that you feel like you could break down and cry Nobody wants to help out when you don't know what to do If they only knew, Oh if they only knew That's all I've got so far.
To figure things out. If anyone misses me, tough luck. I'll probably come back every once in a while, but I just feel so horrible right now... I'm sorry...to everyone...but especially to Kent... EDIT: Also, I wanna put *Polka Dot* in charge of the Rockstar Family...
Just some song I wrote today, which I really don't know why because I'm just a freshman. Oh well...my older friends IRL said I should sing it at their graduation, but my other friend Brooke said I should sing it at my graduation. Verse 1: I need some time to think Is this really happening? It's so hard to say good-bye My family and my friends The ones who made me who I am, I can't bear to leave them behind But I've got my own life to live now, I gotta deal with this somehow Chorus: I've been dreaming for this day yet I don't think I'm prepared Don't wanna lose those memories, all the times we shared Though I hate to admit it, I feel so scared I wish I could stay, but it's graduation day Verse 2: Time has gone by too fast From the first day of preschool to the class Of 2012 Back in the day when we were jokin' around Now we're all dressed up in our caps & gowns To this school, we bid farewell There's so much I wanna say that I couldn't before Now we're walking through that door Chorus: I've been dreaming for this day yet I don't think I'm prepared Don't wanna lose those memories, all the times we shared Though I hate to admit it, I feel so scared I wish I could stay, but it's graduation day Bridge: I wanna thank all my teachers who've taught me so much All my friends I made here, I hope we'll keep in touch To my family, I know that it's hard for me to leave But I'll make you proud, just wait and see Chorus: I've been dreaming for this day yet I don't think I'm prepared Don't wanna lose those memories, all the times we shared Though I hate to admit it, I feel so scared I wish I could stay, I wish I could stay But I've been dreaming for this day yet I don't think I'm prepared Don't wanna lose those memories, all the times we shared Though I hate to admit it, I feel so scared I wish I could stay, but it's graduation day Verse 3: There is no time to think It's really happening So I guess this is good-bye... My older brother says it sucks.
