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By all means, go ahead. It makes me happy that people would get inspired by my work. xD

You and your rape with violent objects c:

That is really cool dude

Iaoyg really is incomprehensible and indescribable, so you can't really depict him, but if this story had a cover it would be either that or something very similar

(^-^)-b

Someone **** on my bathroom floor so I suppose you can use that to testify to something

Still not sure what that something is though

I don't know; a better question would be what price the people I go to want to sell it at

It honestly might

Boats are wonderful things

I was thinking I was going to assemble a collective of short stories, some that I've already written, some that you guys have seen and I'd write a few that would only be in the book

I have a few pictures of things that I dream about but other than that nothing really.

I hope you're not trying to tell me that Lady Liberty is a golddigger

In my head, it's pronounced with each vowels sound running together, but you can feel free to pronounce it "Cats" for all it matters

Brachiation is always a hilarious form of transportation

Thanks for the feedback, you guys <3

EDIT: Also Part II just happened

Alright, well, keep in mind that a piece can be 100 pages long and still have horrible content. Make sure that you put thought and emotion into what you're writing; I'm also in the middle of a psychological horror story so I can tell you to remember that you need to put work into making the reader feel what you want them too. Other than that, there aren't really very many shortcomings of this so far.

This would be amazing if it didn't feel so rushed. You instantly make the assumption that the emotion you want to evoke will be the emotion that the reader feels, and you don't really work towards it or build suspense in any way. Overall, I think that this is a great concept that could have done really well had you put more time into it and made it a bit longer. Two sentences does not a chapter make; and on that same note fitting a successful feeling of suspense in the space you tried to put it in is REALLY difficult.

tl;dr Too short; I feel like you could have done a lot better

And please understand that I don't mean to be mean at all; I'd rather you know what I actually think of this and get better from it than lie and have you think that this is fine where it is.

So far, I see an amazing concept followed up with amazing execution.

LOL EXECUTION
U C WAT I DID THAR?

Anyway, there's not really anything bad about this piece, where others fail in horror you succeed by tugging at the things that everybody is afraid of. Keep doing that, and you should be good. One minor thing though, both of your chapters so far end in some sort of one-liner. It may be just me, but that kind of throws me off; breaking up the pace and such. Keep in mind that this is just a personal observation though. Great job otherwise.

Good deal; thanks dude http://www.kh-vids.net/showthread.php?106618-The-Nonexistence-of-Iaoyg

Yeah man, no problem

It's a temporary thing; I've written another story and I posted it here for feedback But while I was here I thought that I should check up on people

Things got boring. At this point I spend most of my time on deviantArt now.

In all honesty, the probability of me coming back for any amount of time is slim to none. Thanks for the offer though.

I've been pretty good xD I came back momentarily because I'm posting a story I've been writing here But anyway, how have all the duelists been...