Spunk Ransom

xDD A lot of people say that, haha.
Is that bad? D:

Knowing me, I'd respond. I honestly feel weaker now. Not physically but emotionally and mentally. Before, I knew I wouldn't let myself get in too deep. But now, all I do is think about what he did to me and I become depressed and I start to cry. I've become much weaker now.

I was when I was little. He was so magical to me back then. :=D:
So when he died, I didn't notice until a couple of nights ago but I actually went through the five stages of grief.
0__0;;

Denial: There's no way he's dead. Seriously, he must have been stressed out so he decided to fake his own death and he's living happily somewhere right now. MJ can't be dead.

Anger: This wouldn't have happened if those stupid doctors didn't give him those drugs. And he would've been fine going to sleep everynight peacefully if it weren't for those stupid trials. I hate those stupid people. ROAR.

Bargaining: Maybe they got it wrong? Maybe another Jackson was supposed to die, c'mon. Maybe God will pull a miracle and bring him back, please, Lord. ;__;

Depression: (Spent the past week sobbing every night) Dx

And I still haven't accepted it. xDD

So I guess I was a bigger fan than I thought. 8D8

I have a feeling he'll probably text me later or try talking to me on MSN. I don't know. I honestly don't know anymore. Another friend tried talking to him because I didn't feel like telling her everything that happened. To me it seems as if he just used me.

All that lovey-dovey crap he would tell me was a lie. I highly doubt he still likes me too. He most likely moved on already and honestly, I don't care anymore. I feel as if I hate him now but I know I don't. And, I know he still wants to be friends with me but after yesterday, he damaged that chance. I don't know if I should but if I continue being friends with him, those feelings will go deeper and deeper. And I'm afraid of that. I'm actually afraid of falling in love but that's already happened with him.

I'm basically trying to hold back tears. After crying for about an hour last night, I ended up texting him to tell him off. I was pissed off. That's kind of the reason why I'm kind of violent right now. And what hurts even more is that he told me he loved me a lot on Friday, but, now, this.

Yeah...The thing is, he was my first boyfriend. And this isn't the first time he hurt me. We only dated for about a week and then he decided to break up with me just because he said he didn't love me.

Well, it just mainly involved me and my ex, pretty much. He broke up with me yesterday and...yeah. I'm just kind of heart broken right now.

Heh. It's fine. XD

And, it was going okay until yesterday...

inorite? :lolface:

How have you been?

Haha yeah I usually just have someone make me one :P

woah I've never thought to look though livejournal for avys!

Good.
You?

hahaha xD I was like "I wonder....."
Ohmigod! You must keep that avy for at least a day cause that is one awesome avy!!!!

Damn, that's right after my birthday T_T
Well maybe I can ask for it as a late present xD

Hey .

To answer your question whilst being up at 5:00 AM, I got up to talk to Harriet... 8D

I just watched Earth Song (the vid) :3
He was so awesome. Dx
I'm actually really depressed about his death. Like, really, really depressed.

As can I. ;D
I'm listening to MJ right now. @ @

Oh, yay! :33
xDD I forget that too. Reminds me of this one time I said I'd start my RP "tomorrow" when it was like 1AM and the next day Arch wanted me to wait because "I said I would". DDD8